you might have noticed that the good people of Apartment, my intellectual home and heart of the brunswick set, are holding an end of residency party and retrospective of sorts for me at the gallery tonight. it marks the end of a whirlwind year for me (bear in mind 'whirlwind' is quite possibly ever so slightly slower for a lady of my years than of yours, so do make allowances!) and i shall miss it and all the friends i have made along the way.
looking around apartment today as the cosy flat becomes transformed into a gallery, a gallery that is describing and deconstructing the story of my life and times, i am suddenly acutely aware of the enormity of the last 150 years, my small part in it, and its sometimes terrible legacy still being played out today. as i sift through the archives and snapshots of my youth and listen to the reaction of my young friends i see only a cartoon not a real figure, and as i gaze upon the my old correspondence and pictures of friends long departed i feel hardly solid, a mere shadow, a relic, a curiosity or novelty for amusement or entertainment. i have become a voyeur on my own life and am temporarily confused - am i still real? or a mere cypher for my times?
inevitably there are a hundred and one last minute things still to do and as hilary and paul bustle about making things happen, calm and confident in their world and their place in it, i am once again grateful to my gorgeous brunswick set for taking me to their busom as i try to make sense of my survival, my existence and the new role i might play in this strange new century
i do hope you can pop along for sherry and a chat tonight, or for afternoon tea next thursday...all welcome, see you there.
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